Many times we do not ask – why we do what we do !

Many times we do not ask – why we do what we do



Eight monkeys are put in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling. Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder; all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable.

Sooner enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

One of the original monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious, but, undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder. All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why. However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.


A second original monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammer the crap out of him. This includes the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he's not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he's attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys are replaced.


Eight new monkeys are now in the room. None of them have ever been sprayed by ice water.


None of them attempt to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.


Many times we do not ask – why we do what we do!

Is being wrong really so bad?

When trading the markets, it's more common to be wrong than right. There are many ways to be wrong. You can misread a chart pattern, since interpreting a chart is largely a matter of subjective interpretation. You can falsely anticipate what the market will do next, or you can simply commit too much capital to a trading strategy that just may not pan out in the long run. Novice traders, in particular, are infamous for needing to be right. This natural, human tendency is so powerful that novice traders engage in unproductive trading behaviors to avoid admitting that they are wrong. They might hold on to a losing trade, for example, to keep losses on paper. They may procrastinate or put off making a trade in an effort to avoid facing the consequences of a bad trading idea. In many ways, a need to be right can be stifling. Rather than feel free and creative, a trader who consciously or unconsciously needs to be right may hold back at critical moments of trading. When you are inhibited and afraid, you avoid making trades. And unless you make trades in a variety of market conditions, you'll never hone your trading skills and master the markets. To trade like a master, it is vital to stay calm, open, and ready to trade with a winning edge.

Is being wrong really so bad? Many people have trouble admitting they are wrong. It can be difficult to admit we are wrong. It hurts. We tend to place great psychological significance on negative feedback. For example, when we are wrong, it is as if parents or teachers are criticizing us for doing something morally wrong. But this is a false assumption. When we are wrong, or make a mistake, we are not doing anything morally wrong. We are just being human. We all make mistakes and it is vital to take setbacks in stride. If you can learn to downplay the emotional significance of being wrong, you will feel calmer and can trade more freely and creatively.

Another reason we hate being wrong is that we have an irrational need to be perfect. We often assume that unless we are always right, we will not be successful. This is especially true when trading. Every dollar we lose may often require the effort of making two dollars to make up the difference. It's natural to want to be perfect and never lose. But we don't always need to be right. If you make small practice trades, for example, you can make a trade, learn from your mistakes, and make a new trade. Over time, you'll hone your trading skills. Since risk is managed, you can make mistakes and learn from them. There's nothing to fear.

There's no reason to kick you for making a mistake. You're human. You are allowed to be wrong. Don't be afraid to accept your limitations. If you allow yourself to be wrong, you will allow yourself to trade more freely, and over time, you'll hone your trading skills to the point that you will trade the markets skilfully and profitably.

A Good Message!--- Marriage !!!

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband.... “

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
 

Many of life's failures are people, who will not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Some one does understand our problems !!!!

A Priest, a Doctor and an ENGINEER die and go to heaven, they hear

God's voice and it says:

" My dear sons I am really very sorry but the heaven is full and I can

accommodate only one of u, so to choose the right person, one by one

tell me what u have done in your lifetime. "

The Priest goes up first and says "well God I'm a priest, I am u r

humble servant and have spent all my life working to spread your

message."

The Doctor goes up next and says "well I'm a doctor and I have helped

thousands of people recover from their illnesses"

The ENGINEER goes up says "well I worked as a SOFTWARE ENGINEER and........",

before the SOFTWARE ENGINEER could say anything further, the heaven's

gates opened and God came with tears in his eyes and said to the

ENGINEER

         

 

"Say no more my son! Come with me, you have already been thru HELL...! "

Onsite offer - Good one !!!

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I was in flight, was going to onsite once again, was very happy plane takes off, n takes me to the sky.
I looked outside the window, nice evening scene, feels like heaven.
I just lost myself in that beauty.
Someone's voice disturbed me "excuse me sir, would you like to have something?". I turned back, and was surprise to see my beautiful old schoolmate, Saakshi.
"Hey Saakshi, is that you, how come you... wow, you looks still the same, pretty.. in this Air-hostess suit"
"Saurabh, wo.....w, I can’t believe this is you.. ohh sorry I am on my job, will talk to you later"
she left smile on my face. I couldn’t believe in my eyes, It reminded me my school days memories.
How crazy I was about her, always followed her after the school, wrote love letters, but never dared to give one of them. Always looking at her in the class,
from last bench. she was the queen of our class. I fought with 2-3 other guys for her, how stupid I was.
I couldn’t stop myself, looking at her again, I was amazed to see that, she became more beautiful then she were at school.
she too looked at me and smile, then she said something to her fellow air-hostess, then they both started smiling.
I was clueless that what happened. her colleague was also damn pretty. Oh my god, today you fulfill one of my dream.
I thought of going there and having chat with her, but I knew that, it’s her job, so I stopped myself.
again started looking outside the window.
we were above the clouds making an awesome scene outside, also inside, because of her smile.
I got some courage, and pretended that I am going towards toilet.
I looked at her, she understood what I desired.
she came toward me and said : "extremely sorry yaar, I couldn’t talk to you much,
so say how are you, where have you been these many years, and what’s your success story? for what purpose you are going?"
"Hmmm... I was always there, it was you who left everything after school, I searched you, so many places wherever I could, but no existence of you. Then I completed my college, got a job in such a nice company, I didn’t know, my company will give me this much, still I m going for an onsite job, don’t know when will return back. you know, I got everything in my life except someone, with whom I can actually share my world, my success. someone..."
I looked straight into her eyes.. those blue eyes, I think she got the answer, who is that 'someone'
with some pain in her eyes, she said, "sorry got to go, will give you my number"
I again, sat back to my seat, very silent, looking outside, and hoping some answer.
it was dark outside by that time, some thunder in cloud, just like inside my heart.
then suddenly, plane started getting hiccups.. everyone got scared..
I saw Saakshi running towards mic, she made an announcement, that don’t be panic as they are facing a storm outside.
but plane started shaking badly, everyone started feeling it’s the last moment of their lives...
I keep on watching Saakshi, and she to me...
then something hit my back hard.. and there was a complete darkness in front of me..
deep silent, but I could still feel the shaking plane, and people's scream..
then someone shouted... 'Saaaauuuuraaabhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!'
"Saurabh, wake up you are again sleeping in office, wake up, I need that report urgently"
Damn.. I looked here-there, same ODC, no Onsite, no plane.. no Saakshi..
I stared at my PM in anger.. Because of you only, that plane crashed!!
 
I STILL DONT KNOW, WHY IT HAPPENS DAILY BETWEEN 2 TO 3 PM

When you say things in anger

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper.  His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.  The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.  Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down.  He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.  He said, you have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence.  The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. 

You can put a knife in a man and draw it out.  It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there." A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. 

MESSAGE FROM THE POLICE !!!

Got as a Forwarded mail. Informative..
 
Warning..!!! !
 
Just last weekend on Friday night we parked in a public car park. As we drove away I noticed a sticker on the rear window of the car. When I took it off (after I got home), it was a receipt for petrol. Luckily my friend had told me not to stop, as it would be someone waiting for me to get out of the car. Then we received this email yesterday.
 
WARNING FROM POLICE
 
THIS APPLIES TO BOTH WOMEN AND MEN
 
BEWARE OF PAPER ON THE BACK WINDOW OF YOUR VEHICLE.
 
NEW WAY TO DO CAR-JACKINGS.
 
Heads up everyone! Please keep this circulating. You walk across the car park, unlock your car and get inside. You start the engine and put it into Reverse.
 
When you look into the rear-view mirror to back out of your space, you notice a piece of paper stuck to the middle of the rear screen. So you stop, and jump out of your car to remove that paper (or whatever it is), because it is obstructing your view. Then when you reach the back of your car, is when the car-jackers appear out of nowhere. They jump in and take off. They practically run you over as they speed off.
 
And guess what, ladies? I bet your purse is still in the car. So now the car-jacker has your car, your home address, your money, and your keys. Your home and your whole identity are compromised!
 
BEWARE OF THIS NEW SCHEME THAT IS NOW BEING USED.
 
If you see a piece of paper stuck to the back window, lock your doors and just drive away. Remove the paper later. And be thankful that you read this e-mail. I hope you will forward this to friends and family, especially to women. A purse contains all kinds of personal information and identification documents, and you certainly do NOT want this to fall into the wrong hands.
 
Please follow and tell others :
 
Similarly If you are driving at night and were attacked with EGGS  on your car's windshield , do not operate your wiper or spray any water.  Eggs mixed with water become milky and block your vision up to 92.5 %. You are forced to stop at road side and become victim of robbery. This is new technique used by robbers. Take care and Drive Safe.

WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN’T WE?

WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN’T WE?
This is a true story that happened in Japan.

In order to renovate the house,

someone in Japan breaks open the wall.

Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls.

When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there

because a nail from outside hammered into one of its feet.

He sees this, feels pity, and at the same time curious, as when he checked the nail,

it was nailed 10 years ago when the house was! first built.

What happened?

The lizard has survived in such position for 10 years!

In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, it is impossible and mind-boggling.

Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 10 years! without moving a single step–since its foot was nailed!

So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it has been doing, and what and how it has been eating.

Later, not knowing from where it came, appears another lizard, with food in its mouth.

Ah! He was stunned and touched deeply.

For the lizard that was stuck by nail, another lizard has been feeding it for the past 10 years. ;

Imagine? it has been doing that untiringly for 10 long years, without giving up hope on its partner.

Imagine what a small creature can do that a creature blessed with a brilliant mind can’t.

 never abandon your loved ones

Never Say U R Busy When They Really Need You..

You May Have The Entire World At Your Feet.

But You Might Be The Only World To Them.

A Moment of negligence might break the very heart which loves you thru all odds..

Before you say something just remember. It takes a moment to Break but an entire life to make…
To Live Use Heart And to Survive use Brains.

Succesful Relationships !!!

A GOOD ONE 4 those who are married or are going to get married.. Here we go..!

 

During one of seminars, a woman asked a common question.

She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?"

I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said,

"It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a

completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...

Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling is love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.

But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage! , you wi ll notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage..

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression "the labor of love."

Because it takes time, effort, and energy . And most importantly, it takes WISDOM . You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...you can "make" love.

Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling.

"No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE.

No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK.

And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by choice" 

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